11.07.2011
vacation-ish
I'm finally on vacation sort of...if Minnesota counts. It's nice to be away from my job for the week, sort of since I still have to answer the phone and check email. I am looking forward to doing what I want for the week though, whether that be laying in bed all day or working out or swimming or shopping. My vacation started the best way possible...getting dropped off at Super Target for 3.5 hours! A week of relaxing (a word not really used or liked in my vocab) is much needed and deserved if I might say so myself.
11.06.2011
a dog?
We have always talked about having a dog but have always lived somewhere that did not allow dogs. We can now have a dog at our current place, it has been a brief thought in my mind since we moved in but with how busy the summer was with work and being pregnant then miscarrying that thought quickly left my mind. Well last night S said we needed to talk and our talk was about getting a dog. I could tell he was really excited about it and he mentioned that this seems like the best time for us to do it. Of course being the person I am, said things like what if I'm allergic or what if my mom is (she spends quite a bit of time here that it would break my heart for her to not be able to come here). My biggest fear was that if I was allergic, we'd have to get rid of the dog and the trauma of losing another "thing" in our life (damn infertility). I would love to have a dog especially since I'm home during the day and would have someone to hang out with while S is at work, I'd also have a running buddy! After talking more about it we decided we'd start to look but also maybe wait a bit longer before jumping into this since S is starting a new job and dogs can be expensive so we'll see how our income is with his new job. I also mentioned the fact that we are going to see a new OBGYN in January and that could be another added cost to our life depending on what she says is our best option for getting pregnant.
11.05.2011
i want a baby
It's a very well known fact that I want a baby but it suddenly dawned on me the other night I want to be a mother. You'd think it wouldn't take me 3 years to realize that, let me explain.
My mom came and stayed the night because S was gone hunting. She and I were talking about her work meeting she just came from and she told me about one of the teachers who asked for a prayer request. The prayer request was for her 17 year old daughter who is pregnant, my mom went on to tell me that this girls mother was never able to have children and the children she did have were adopted. The teacher expressed they do not know what to do. As I sat there listening to my mom tell me this I wanted to scream out, I WILL TAKE THAT BABY AS MY OWN! It was right then and there I realized I do not care how I become a mother but rather I just want to give my love to a child who will one day call me mom.
I'm not sure where this will lead us, I'm not even sure I'm ready to think about foster care or adoption but it is something that is on my mind now.
My mom came and stayed the night because S was gone hunting. She and I were talking about her work meeting she just came from and she told me about one of the teachers who asked for a prayer request. The prayer request was for her 17 year old daughter who is pregnant, my mom went on to tell me that this girls mother was never able to have children and the children she did have were adopted. The teacher expressed they do not know what to do. As I sat there listening to my mom tell me this I wanted to scream out, I WILL TAKE THAT BABY AS MY OWN! It was right then and there I realized I do not care how I become a mother but rather I just want to give my love to a child who will one day call me mom.
I'm not sure where this will lead us, I'm not even sure I'm ready to think about foster care or adoption but it is something that is on my mind now.
11.03.2011
getaway
I am really looking forward to getting away next week even if it's just to Minnesota for 5 days. I need a break from the crazy life here although I have to keep the phone transferred to me and answer emails but at least I can screen all those calls and emails. I won't feel so crazy having to be stuck in the house all day waiting around for a contractor, I thought fall was going to be much easier and laid back so far it has not been that. The phone definitely rings less, there are no showings but I still feel like I run around like a chicken with my head cut off most days. I think I am really in need of a break and some me time, to do whatever it is I want for 5 days straight!
11.02.2011
new doctor
I'm really excited to have an appointment set with a new OBGYN. I'm really not excited to have to wait until January 10th.
I had a pretty uplifting day yesterday that made me feel like I am part of the "norm" as we like to call it in our house. The "norm" is someone who is experiencing infertility or miscarriage and/or someone who has, someone who actually understands the feelings. Anyway I talked with two people yesterday who have dealt with both infertility and miscarriages. I hate that we are a part of that club but it's always nice to know I'm not alone and to see there is hope because both of these women have overcome those obstacles in her life. It truly gives me hope.
Back to my new doctor. I made a list of requirements for a new doctor the two main things were a female and someone who was a little bit younger. My previous OBGYN was starting to get old, she was supposed to deliver me. She was just too conservative for me at this stage in the game, wait she's always been to conservative throughout this whole thing for 3 years. I also was looking for an OBGYN who possible had an emphasis in fertility or could do in clinic IUIs, which I had found out there was one group of doctors who did that so that's where my search began. I narrowed the field down to 6 or 7 doctors and then had S help me make a finally decision. Oh another HUGE requirement was that the new OBGYN was covered under both of our insurance plans, new and old. With S's help we were able to further narrow the pickings to 2 OBGYNs and just pick one based off who had availability first. Nothing too exciting to report about her yet aside from watching a video I don't really know her but from the video I really liked her personality. I am really looking forward to meeting her and having an OBGYN who takes an active approach in my healthcare.
I had a pretty uplifting day yesterday that made me feel like I am part of the "norm" as we like to call it in our house. The "norm" is someone who is experiencing infertility or miscarriage and/or someone who has, someone who actually understands the feelings. Anyway I talked with two people yesterday who have dealt with both infertility and miscarriages. I hate that we are a part of that club but it's always nice to know I'm not alone and to see there is hope because both of these women have overcome those obstacles in her life. It truly gives me hope.
Back to my new doctor. I made a list of requirements for a new doctor the two main things were a female and someone who was a little bit younger. My previous OBGYN was starting to get old, she was supposed to deliver me. She was just too conservative for me at this stage in the game, wait she's always been to conservative throughout this whole thing for 3 years. I also was looking for an OBGYN who possible had an emphasis in fertility or could do in clinic IUIs, which I had found out there was one group of doctors who did that so that's where my search began. I narrowed the field down to 6 or 7 doctors and then had S help me make a finally decision. Oh another HUGE requirement was that the new OBGYN was covered under both of our insurance plans, new and old. With S's help we were able to further narrow the pickings to 2 OBGYNs and just pick one based off who had availability first. Nothing too exciting to report about her yet aside from watching a video I don't really know her but from the video I really liked her personality. I am really looking forward to meeting her and having an OBGYN who takes an active approach in my healthcare.
11.01.2011
a new month
As today begins another new month I am feeling good, not the normal here is the beginning of ANOTHER month, ANOTHER month added to our journey, ANOTHER month closer to the 3 year mark of trying to get pregnant. I am really looking forward to this month, there a lot of things happening. S starts his new job next Monday, I am making an appointment today with a new OBGYN, and I am going to be starting new supplements from Shaklee. I will continue to share about all of these things happening in our life, we are both feeling excited about the new adventures!
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